TheProfessionals ? David Woods

Post: Artistic Director, Van Driver, Part-time Administrator, Fund-raiser, Lugger?.

Organisation: Ridiculusmus

Length of service: 9 years

Address: No fixed abode

What does your organisation do?
Tour small-scale theatre UK and internationally. Experiments with other stuff, live art, cabaret, music, film, radio.

What does your current job involve?
Everything except flirting, schmoozing and selling. We?ve employed a firewall to do that for us.

Who did you used to work for and what did you do?
National Audit Office, auditing the Inland Revenue, among others: Challenger Courier Co., driving parcels around London: and Woolworth?s, stacking shelves

What do you enjoy most about your present post?
Total submersion

What do you find most difficult in your present post?
Poverty and sleeping in bubble-wrap on the South Bank every now and then

What is your career ambition?
To be able to live in one place

Who has influenced your career to date the most ? and why?
Rip-off merchants and sharks who taught me to watch my back

If you could have done any job in the world, what would you like to have done?
Yuri Gagarin?s

If you have three wishes for the future of the arts, what would they be?
? Get rid of parasites and sycophants
? Fund with respect
? Open the doors